Carly, my sister, drove me home from the hospital at about 4:00am. Her presence through that ordeal was an unbelievable comfort to me. Something I’ll never forget, and hopefully something I’ll never have to do in return. Carly had a special relationship with Susie. She saw her as the older sister she never had. She’d …
If it was me, and this was you,Where would you be? What would you do? Would you have yet stopped thinking about the night that we first met?Would the pain of precious memories still escort you to bed?Would heaving loneliness be your most frequented friend?Would your spark have met its match and burnt out to its …
Today marks four months since Susie died. Four months. The monthly milestones don’t really mean that much in themselves – it is just another day after all – but they always seem to throw up a reason to reflect all the more. Today, I’ve been thinking a lot about the curiosity of time in grief. …
A friend asked me today “What has been the hardest adjustment following Susie’s death?” I appreciated the question for a number of reasons. First, it showed a willingness to walk in the darkness with me for a few moments, a willingness to understand at a deeper level what our experience has been like. But, secondly, …
What is grief? What is grief? There are a number of helpful definitions out there for grief. For me, though, grief is a state of being you enter when you experience a soul-altering loss. Psychology would probably want to replace the word “soul” here with something more medically grounded. But in my experience, and I …
Falling, in love Thursday 5th July 2018 I like to believe she died in my arms. I don’t know whether that’s the case, medically. But I like to think her last conscious memory was of me holding her, caring for her, as she fell. I want that to be true. It all happened so quickly. …
A lime green top, denim jeansThe happiest face I’d ever seenA summer night, aged nineteenAnd you sat down and talked to me We spoke about greener pasturesA better lifeYour words, your voiceLit up the nightYour faith, your love, shone so brightGreener pasturesA better life I called, you answered, we spoke a whileWe laughed, we shared, …